She just sent me a txt where every word ended in "zzz", with about a hundred "!!!" and called herself "juicezzz". I need back up.
For real. Like, if I ever had to choose a last meal, I would just choose to get high and eat whatever was around.
She is definitely tripolar. Like bipolar but better/worse.
When boys buy condoms it makes me feel proud of their mothers for doing a good job
Like. I probably should fuck him. I owe him for breaking his thumb.
I woke up to him pissing in their fireplace with fairy wings on.
the japanese bartender dressed as a cowboy in assless chaps just told me i was too drunk for another shot
Fuck you, I'm yelling at a mountain right now
I have bruises all over my legs. Did I hit a car with my bike last night?
im questioning your sanity while also accepting your reality
Well, if it's rabies, your lips will swell just prior to the frothing. Get a lot of good pics!
If I could steal your goatee and hide it under my bed to keep your from wearing it, I would.
you were so high you asked for half double stack and half crispy chicken sandwich "welded together" in the wendy's drive through
He chose me to be his birthday sex..theres a lot of pressure riding on this bang
You threw a beachball full of vodka at me and yelled I CHOOSE YOU then ran
Randomize
