wooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo
ooooooooooooo i'm drink
he just sent me a friend request on facebook. i wish it were physically possible to vomit on him through the internet.
OMG! Someone dumped chocolate soft-serve in the bathroom! Dibs!
hey remember that time we got really drunk, you tried to find narnia in my refrigerator and passed out in the freezer drawer??
no.
he literaly had industrial grade plastic underneth his blankets
I only want to screw him when I'm drunk. Problem is I try to be drunk as often as possible
Mcdonalds hasn't even finished serving breakfast yet and u two are getting drunk?
My ex just sent me a message asking if she could blow me, but only if we get caught by her new bf. If she promises to swallow I'm doing it.
It's gay pride, I'm in my EMT uniform getting more girls than your straight ass ever will..
Amanda, I can 99.9% assure you i'm probably never going to bang your mom
I DON'T LIKE THAT SENTENCE
I just wanna get drunk and watch Tarzan with you is that to much to ask?!?
I apologize for using the phrase "monster cock hentai porn shit" to describe that guy I picked up last week.
Okay, the good news, found Jared, all IDs accounted for, Jack is meeting us at yours with your requested the delivery. The bad news: Lost Alice, banned from Stages, possibly fucked my TA in the bathroom.
Is it ok to bone a former patient who is also a client? Since it is two negatives does that cancel and become a positive?
Totally unrelated, but by the way I DO have one ball bigger than the other.
Randomize
