Hehe I wanna Australian kiss.. Its like a French kiss but down under ;)
don't worry, i already broke the ice when i told the story about how i super glued a picture of big bird to my vag.
I am not sure how to feel about the fact that I was turned on by someone with a penis. I can't believe Lady Gaga would do this to me. :(
my underwear are soaked with white zifandel yet i have continued to wear them despite the fact im at home
The story about him having a girlfriend changed real fast when he found out that I was a gymnast
One last question would your parents let me sleep in your bathtub for the night?
did we decide the 'sorry about the threesome' cake was too flippant?
I need moral support for this bender
Getting a vibrator would be like waving the white flag of surrender in this war against my vagina and its hormone army.
What is the current exchange rate for ramen to jello shots?
We took it as we must go to waffle house or else we will upset the gods.
Who ever is in the stall next to me is crying and it sounds like they're doing massive amounts of blow too. Finals for your ass huh.
Come over so we can have two person sex in this one person tent
He's getting Easter eggs filled with weed or Jell-O shots for his birthday
He called me at 4 a.m. and wanted me to drive him to McDonald's then drop him off at home. It wasn't even a booty call, it was a fucking chauffeur call.
Randomize