it always starts out as a suggestion then three hours later I have cum in my eye.
in the 'for' section of the check i put "when we got drunk and broke things". again im sorry.
Hindsight: maybe I should have included a few transitional texts in between talking about your son and my need to have sex. Do over?
All i remember was you crying naked on the bathroom floor because you were cold. I got you a blanket and you kept kicking it off and crying because you were still cold.
We dared each other to drink Arbor Mist, and I waterboarded someone with tequila.
Haha I'm surprised I didn't see you I was drunkenly buying $70 in merchandise including a vibrating cock ring at that cvs around that time
you taught an eight year old how to shotgun a half pint of chocolate milk, that's all i'm saying
I thought my dog was a polar bear. I kept asking how the north pole was this time of year.
So I've been spending my morning trying to figure out if there's a corealation between Wednesday margarita night and the boat that's now in my living room.
Also I would love to pregame at your place if I weren't stuck at mine drinking laxatives
sidebar: i fucked your brother last night
I'm excited for him and his new girlfriend. I'm just going to miss his penis is what I'm saying.
I mean she did throw a tantrum because you wouldn't let her suck your dick
You tried to pick a fight with a polka band saying that you'd wrap the accordion around their throats
I have 4 more smokes and 6 more beers to go before I make a life changing decision like that.
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