I don't know what kind of drugs you were on last night but you kept trying to highlight my face because you said I was important
and i looked up. we had an audience...
i wish we had morning classes together so we can spike our coffee.
Go on vacation with her and forget to pack pants. I did that once and it worked like a charm.
She fell asleep on the sidewalk and people starting using her as a hurdle
Dude i'm seriously thinking about his nipples.
What's the appropriate I've been inside you but we're not technically dating valentines present?
She is a social worker. An actual good person trying to save the world. I feel like every time I give her an orgasm God wipes a little smudge off of my shit list.
High school girls are buying me shots. This will not end well.
He always finds the good stuff. He's like a truffle pig for bud.
I've never seen a guy eye-fuck someone so hard in my entire life. I thought he would develop laser vision, bore holes into your body, and not even realize your innards would be spilling everywhere. That's how bad it was.
I asked him if he wanted a pillow, and he replied "No. Batman never had pillows."
YOU DRINK NOW BECAUSE YOU ARE A STRONG INDEPENDENT WOMAN WHO DOESN'T NEED A DRINKING PARTNER
Guess who just enrolled into online classes at Hogwarts? This gal.
How dare you not respond to me after opening up a picture of my bare breasts
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