All of his creepy stalker friends want you too
Every time we have sex I can't stop thinking about Jesus
what do kids with lesbian moms do for father's day? like do you talk about it? is it awkward? do you get the butchy mom a card?
You asked the dj to play 'who let the dogs out" because it was your birthday. You left the bar and then re-entered to the song
He was on Keeping Up with the Kardashians it was like a deed from god to bang him
i know and i thought i was only capable of loving dick and drugs, im so happy
i'm taking a spore imprint of the mushroom we found growing in our bathroom and sending a picture to ryan. he will then be able to tell if it's trip-worthy
I applaud your efforts, but I have to say it was the bear we encountered that ultimately shut down the entire operation
you haven't really lived until you are in a situation where your vagina is hanging out
The sad part is I didn't even want to get laid. I just wanted the emotional connection, but my vagina was screaming "TOUCH ME. TOUCH ME RIGHT NOW BECAUSE MY DADDY ISSUES ARE MUCH DEEPER THAN MY EMOTIONAL NEEDS!" Vodka has a way of getting me out of my emotions and gets me fucked every time.
For what it's worth, I didn't think that hitting you with a crowbar as hard as I did would break your arm like that. You should drink more milk.
I can not believe he edited a picture of our three way and made it his profile picture
Please explain the hospital band on my wrist.
wow bdsm is so cute
I dropped my slice of pineapple on the kitchen floor and was just staring at it about to cry. It was really good pineapple.
Randomize
