I guess she didn't feel like it. There was hair all over it and everything
between no blow jobs for the rest of his life, or no cheese for the rest of his life, he chose no blowjobs. ive never felt so bad about my bj abilities before
just found my calculator watch from 6th grade. the hipster transformation is complete
Excuse me by sucking dick i am fighting crime. Just think of all the prostitues going out of business and getting real jobs.
could you please not use my mortar and pestal for its intended purpose? i just snorted cracked black pepper.
Basically as long as the fan is pointed at my vagina i can cool off enough to sleep.
Happy Birhtday!
Dad, it's 3am and it's not my birthday... wherever you are, go home
it still weirds me out that Robin Thicke is Alan Thicke's son
It turns out my English teacher used to pose for Playboy. She's an inspiration.
He came so hard that he yelled what sounded like a spell from Harry Potter.
But for real though. That weed tastes like the jolly laughter of Santa Claus.
She started snoring post sex, so I drunkenly walked 8 miles at 4am to go fishing. Please come pick me up
I've never seen anyone as high as you were.. you collapsed onto the kitchen floor hugging a tub of ice cream. You named it phil.
Omg. I meet up with you guys with bodily fluids on my chin ONE time and suddenly I'm a whore.
I wasn’t trying to be creepy it just happened
I’m beginning to think that’s your defining personality trait.
Randomize
