It's like sexual therapy. We hooked up. And now were talking about our recent breakups.
Emoooo
There's a woman here that looks like a cross between Michael Jackson and Flipper.
i hate that site..its like every vagina you dont wanna see
These people need to leave so I can have rum and Doritos at work like every other American.
it's like there's an entire ecosystem in your vagina.
I seriously think I have a tan line on my stomach from getting a boner while in the taning bed.
he called us the olsen twins. we also rapped ignition much to his dismay.
I just realized I'm trading you a pregnancy test for the morning after pill...
It's been a bad semester.
After she lost the bet I made her get on one knee so she could "Te-blow me"
Please tell me there isn't another video of me on the toilet...
I dressed up as a breathalyzer test for Halloween; never had so many straight dudes blow me before!
Probably twitter. Never underestimate a psycho girl with wifi
Just caught myself checking an online porn site while in a strip club. Might have a problem.
The only thing I want for my birthday is a divorce from you.
and then she asked if she could shave my junk
and howd that go?
can you pick me up from the hospital?
Randomize
