You supply the liquor and I'll "accidently" forget my bathing suit.
Deal!
My pussy is not your playground.
I think I found an E pill under the couch.. Or really bad tasting candy. Check back in 30min this could get exciting
We had sex and then he fed me pie. This is the best friends-with-benefits situation ever.
Just sponge bathed with a swissper. Thrush inevitable. Shaking.
it was really awkward meeting your mom for the first time while i was still wearing the condom we were using.
For thanksgving we are only drinking wild turkey for the next 24hrs time to strap your balls back on and maybe a helmet
Ps we bought 8 pellet guns just now
I feel like I'm laying on a pillow cloud. With little baby angel fingers between me and the cloud lifting me up. Singing hymns in my ear.
It's gay softball weekend. Lots of hot gay strangers to go home with.
Sorry about the whole your mom seeing my face up your ass situation
They sleep with other people as long as there is no oral. Logic and reason were thrown out the window a long time ago with them.
Is it too early in the day to be getting dressed for the strip club?
rest in peace liver.
It was nice having you occupy space in my body that could be holding beer n chicken.
that's going in my livers obituary.
But we made up last night and had unbelievably crazy sex tonight. I legit went blind for like 15mins from him choking me. It was awesome
Did you see her happy birthday to emily on facebook? The gist of it is like: hey emily you almost died at birth im glad you didn't. love mom.
Randomize
