you know what sucks? talking to chicks you dont want to have sex with
Oh I forgot to tell u. I hit someone with my car in the RiteAid parking lot. More like a nudge.
Im otw to class. I was at the Library. Just past three girls with a bottle of tequila playing dizzy bat.
I'm sorry for gagging during our first time having sex
I was drunk
Please answer
We can't be fuck buddies. You stare into my eyes while we fuck.
who dressed up as a cop at your party???
idk I have to check. Why?
he gave me the best strip search of my life. FIND HIM.
Not sure if you're still doing the whole "sleeping with only one person" thing but if you're not we should sleep together when I get back in town tonight.
i was giving head the other day and thought of your all penis tastes the same quote and couldnt stop laughing
Got head at the top of a water slide over-looking the valley while wearing a sombrero and drinking a corona. Epic.
So right before she was about to give me head she tapped the tip and said "Is this thing on" I think I'm in love.
you can't tell me not to come to work cause roads are bad then ask me an hour later to come in and expect me to be sober
Does this mean I have to put a bra on now
I have put on lipstick and signed up for class. Nothing more shall be expected of me today.
He may have been a dick but he DID give me his Netflix log in. Maybe some good did come of it.
He’s like Batman if Batman went down on me and gave me multiple toe curling orgasms. He left without saying a word before I pulled the pillow off my face
Find out if he’s shared his techniques with a friend and set me up with him. You know I’ve always had a thing for Robin!!!!
Randomize