After she swallowed she let out a hurge burp. No BS. I'm the cock of the walk.
I think you have the wrong number. But at any rate, respect.
my sisters under your porch take her home
she was like a sexier Rosie O'Donnel
I think his glow in the dark Star Wars sheets, at the time, really turned me on.
I've been watching anime, masturbating and eating nutella for three days. I hope she never comes back.
So, do you ever feel like EVERY SINGLE ONE OF YOUR FRIENDS IS INVOLVED IN A MASSIVE AND INTRICATE CONSPIRACY TO COCKBLOCK YOU AT ALL COSTS?
She's clinging to me like a horny koala.
LEAVE MY LITTLE DICK OUT OF THIS
You burned the hair off your arms. Again.
It grows back stronger each time.
How is there no taco emoji?! That's some bullshit.
The cops spotted my on my walk of shame down the boardwalk and gave me a ride home. I'm starting to make a name for myself here.
40 year old guy made out with me last night while I had French fries in my mouth
Captain Morgan does not know self control. Nor does he teach it.
so my dads pretending to use the snow blower and theres absolutley no snow one the ground.... someone should really lock our liqour cabinet
Nothing says hangover like being in the doctors office getting a tampon removed from deep inside
Randomize
