Let's start a violent farting gang. We can do walkbys.
I'm just looking at Lindsay Lohan's vagina.
Oh yea! I was just doing that too!
I wanna be on tlc
Impossible. You are neither fat, fertile or fashionless.
True story: Just left my solo cup on a cop car. Yesss
Ive had to apologize to every girl i know today because of you
I just egged your windshield and it froze on contact. Have fun with that.
: am i supposed to send the mass text 'merry christmas!' to my booty calls too?
CONGRATS VODKA, YOU WON RHIS TIME..
bringing a ziploc bag full of Jim Beam to the movies may not have been the best idea.
you were trying to control your nosebleed while having someone hold your four loko while you drank it through a straw. all at the same time. that is commitment.
...And then you kept screaming "cock mouth" in her face every time she tried to talk.
I've smoked enough weed to put down a pony.
I know but we're going to blackout city so it'll probably be warm there
I almost got an A in organic chem but started hallucinating during the final so I got a C
That's so awful of me. Instead of comforting her I masturbated in front of my ex-boyfriend.
Randomize
