Why are handjobs necessary in class?
You would think that someone would have been sober enough to object to vodka bong races.
We've done the math and the dogs tails are wagging at a rate of 3000 wags per hour. Stoned.
He sent me a pic of his Junk. He said it was a Brett Farve valentine.
Ask her if said friend is decent looking or a wildabeast. Need to know if I need to top these 8 coronas off with a little tequila.
I want her autograph on my taint
I just shotgunned a beer alone in the bathroom...what do you expect from me
My roommate said I banged on the wall and said, "this dude eats pussy like a champ."
My mouth taste like pussy and my dad noticed. Hahahaha
She screamed at us, "You guys need to wake up and smell the beer-bong!"
I told her my hands felt like they touched the sun, never been that stoned before
I'm never going out with the ashleys again. it was whoreible. terrifyingly whoreible.
you're like an angel sent from heaven to guide my sex life into greatness
Thats so sweet
Just bought plan b at 8am. Then the cashier asked if I wanted to donate to the children's miracle network. Fml
Bruh. He just said the words "cyber sex"-is it 1999?
Randomize
