I'm scared
There's nothing to be scared of. My penis is average size.
That's what I'm afraid of
Scream out, "Tax-Free dick over here" in the bar. Ladies love tax free stuff
I'm about two and a half drinks away from gay.
I'm coming over.
I just realized that two weekends in a row we ended up in a bathroom with two different boys asking us for a threesome. does this happen to everyone?
Did you write your name in the dust on our toilet tank?
I cannot believe I said bareback movement...
Is it wrong that I want to take the baby bump in her facebook pictures as "meal-ticket"?
maybe her throwing up on me was a foreshadowing of how she would later metaphorically throw up on my life
I'm almost too hungover to function. Got into the wrong car by mistake. there was a rotweiler in it. Thank god he was more confused than i was for a minute.
We had sex on a dog bed..
After we had sex he began to tell me the craziest places he's had sex. He told me KFC bathroom so I rolled over and went to sleep.
It figures that the only time one of my videos on Snapchat gets replayed is a video of my Hedonism Bot impression and NOT my nudes
All I did today was eat pizza and use my vibrator.
how the FUCK did i spend 25 dollars at 50 cent beer night?
I am NOT losing my v-card to a guy who doesn't know my ass from my elbow.
Randomize
