I CAN MOONWALK!
Omg. I just woke up in a room full of naked people
she's into porn, im staying here tonight
I did my dad and i had to keep going back there to pick up coffee
please read the first 4 words of that text and consider punctuation
the world took limewire and four lokos away from me in one week....hello depression
If people don't want my drunken phone call then TAKE YOUR FUCKING NUMER OFF OF FACEBOOK, like it's just that easy...
His thanks his mom for not having an abortion at his wedding toast. I love frat weddings.
She kept telling me to calm down. I was on the floor with my eyes shut, not moving. In levels of calm I was one step above coma patient
Also yeah I would definitely have to say that one of my favorite things to do is to get high and pet cats.
Would it be weird to tell him that on his b'day he's dressing up and we're having weird Jesus sex?
I have a 8 minute video of a fish tank on my phone.
We need to stop going to pet stores high.
So how does one go about leaving their family vacation to hang out with someone they met on tinder
We figured you were on something when you said that your nipples couldn't hear the music.
its the 14th virginity that counts the most anayways
I thought I was drunk because I kept grabbing his arm instead of his dick
But then I realized it wasn’t his arm and that I was very lucky
Randomize
