My vagina is in bus station locker number 1465.You can go talk to it if u like -in the mean time I’m going 2show up drunk and embarrass u at work.
You will receive a large, large reward, worth much more than the actual phone you are holding, paid not only in cash but in sexual favors, if you return this phone! Please respond if you're interested in cash/sex/or just being a good person. Thanks and hope to hear from you soon!
U should feel bad.. u r like a sex politician. All talk and no follow thru
I make one hell of a fire on Ambien. Other life choices not so much. But fire. Fire I can do.
I just wanted to warn you I have strep throat incase I gave it to that guy we both hooked up with on New Years.
Only Tommy would bring a stripper pole to a bonfire
Riding the train home at 6 am for class still drunk is losing its novelty in my junior year
Let's play "Guess What I Just Found In My Vagina?"
Adulthood is weird i just cleared a check larger than my gross income from 2011 but i also just did coke during my lunch break
I was gonna jerk off, but then I thought about that movie last night and it killed that idea. I have serious boner trauma.
I don't WANT a sex disease! Especially one assigned to me by my supervisor..
I don't want my vagina anymore.
"WHAT IS THIS LESBIAN MADNESS"
Can’t. It’s taco and dick night.
My Hitachi broke 1 day into this stay home bullshit.
Randomize
