I'm sorry, but there's just something about mesh over nipples that irks me.
that was a gay-test. you passed.
with flying rainbow colors i hope!
i learned a valuable lesson last night. sometimes nice girls finish first. twice.
a queef is a wish your heart makes.
New pre-game routine....wal-mart bathrooms...quality beers for free...hallelujah
and then you went into taco bell without pants...and surprisingly you weren't the only one there without pants
I thought I broke my iPhone. I was almost as depressed as the day I broke my vibrator.
Drinking with birthday clown in the backyard shed at a 5 year olds birthday party at 12 in the afternoon. My life doesn't need any adjustments
she puked as i came inside her. that has to mean something.
I NEVER left your party last night of anyone asks.
Yeah, I didn't wake up handcuffed to my bed either.
Please, take the 2 shots of vodka that I left as an apologie.
If the world ends now I want you to know I was on my favorite toilet fighting the good fight.
My homemade mace ate through its aluminum container. I make awesome mace.
I am just glad I was home to catch most of it, cause it smells BAD.
I'm not a scientist but that could be because it's homemade mace. That is however just a hypothesis
You should be able to leave recommendations on Tinder.
He brought me another shot of rum, ice and my underwear when I woke up.
What a gentleman.
I KNOW, right?!
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