How'd it feel making her break her religion?
i guess that's what happens when you find your girlfriend at the zoo
I'm so hungover that the internet is hard.
he was writing an apology letter to his liver in shakespearean english... That much fun...
You're the only person I know who would say "we'll play it by ear" referring to a threesome
I walked in and she was kneeling on the ground with no pants on, throwing up, and holding the puppy. It was one of those moments, where i was like damn i wish i had my camera.
It's the first day of summer. It's not a race it's a marathon. Pace yourself
Oh my god I'm so bored. The virgin is so disinteresting when I'm not trying to cum on her face.
this lesbian fantasy crush is getting WAY out of hand. just spent an entire meeting staring at her long fingers thinking, "oh those could be fun"
banged a milf last night. she left right after cause of parent teacher conferences this morning. victory.
Please ask me to tell you about the time I watched two of my friends chase my drunk roommate with a broken foot around downtown
I heard them banging and it sounded like he was trying to stuff a fucking coconut into her
well it was great until i saw his anime body pillow
I thought I needed to get laid. Turns out I just needed pasta.
There's nothing wrong with using cocaine to keep my heart rate up in my fitness class.
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