I hope mine doesn't look like that
It's an Italian thing I guess, grew up on that shit.
I'm Irish, we don't eat cow guts unless they're blended into a fine whiskey
what i wouldnt give for a night at orourkes without seeing 3+people ive slept with
Is it weird that we showed each other our pussy's and pointed out the good and bad things about each others??
will power is for people who don't want to get laid
i thought to myself 'what a productive day'. then i realized all ive done is one load of laundry and shaved my balls.
I hope the prosecutor is a dude cause my lawyer is hot.
I was hidding Easter eggs in CHURCH this morning when one of the older men came up to me and said "I always knew you'd be a bunny just not the Easter kind" ... Our congregation obviously has high hopes for their pastor's daighter
i need to know the scientific term for a guy's taint so i can explain what i did last night.
I can't remember if the bartender cut you off after you broke your glass or after you wished the bar a happy winter solstice during your karaoke number.
I head back to the dorms in less than a week I'm not ready to see my roomate naked that much again.
we got 12 live crabs and then we got really stoned and know we're playing with the crabs. thats nom watermellon nom. now i'm plaing with a crap whos such a gentleman
also Jesus you really need to change your diet. I just washed your baby gravy out of my hair and it's so acidic my hair is damaged. You have killer sperm
If hypothetically I needed to puke on the bus... how would I go about doing this.
You were so drunk Last night you asked for your glasses so you could read the directions on a band aid
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