tell her no need for introductions. and that you've read about her on the back of toilet doors.
The best thing happened. Some guy was butchering Conway Twitty at karoke and the power went off in the whole bar. And someone shouted "you pissed jesus off when you messed with conway!"
My vagina smells like strawberry tangerine twist.
redhead is getting on the bull...again red head is getting on the bull!
She just got back from rehab. You dont celebrate that with margaritas.
I don't believe these are real court rooms. They look absolutely nothing like law and order.
So i literally just wrote sorry on my quiz and turned it in.
We had break up sex twice. He said one was cause he had to say goodbye to both tits.
I think the main reason you were throwing up so much was the quart of soap you chugged trying to burp bubbles. you came close
Spilled red wine all over my bed. This has to be the fiftieth time ive refused to fall asleep without a drink in my hand
Today is leap day..... If that's not an excuse to blackout all day I don't know what is
We're all just looking at each other quietly, hoping that no one brings up last nights shenanigans.
If a handjob meant commitment I would literally touch zero dicks
You ripped my pants off and gave me the choice use it or lose it what was I suppose to do.
Turns out I screen transfered my streaming trucker restroom porn vid to the downstairs neighbors'TV instead of my own, damn you chromecast
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