So how come you never look me in the eyes anymore when we make love?
did you get my message about your dog?
no... is he ok?
no, i didn't see him when i was being chased out of your house. check your drive way :( sry
its summer. and we all know college gfs do not count in summer.
college gfs dont count ever. theyre like getting corn rows in jamaica. you feel cool at the time. then you go home and people make fun of you.
We played shuffleboard at the bar last night...another sign we are getting tooooo old.
you know its summer when you wake up on the toilet
Well I turned her sobriety into my own personal drinking game
Let's just rave with boners that last for hours
He insisted he brought his alarm clock everywhere, and then the girl screamed "fuck French people!"
That idiot. I'll see him on campus and he'll try and touch me like we're friends or some shit. 1.you're ugly 2. You dropped the blunt in the pool
I'm so fucking horny right now If I blink I might cum
Finding an empty bathroom to shit on campus is like the quest for the fucking Holy Grail. Except with more stench and humiliation.
He's gonna be so upset when he get's a real job and can't do serious drugs.
His whole street is under construction. Third walk of shame this week & I'm getting a lot of sympathetic nods from the workers.
She said "we just have chemistry" ... I wanted to say "no, you just have a vagina."
All I did today was eat pizza and use my vibrator.
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