I plan on putting pajamas back on after I shower. Today is going to be awesome.
Let's play a little game called "Chill the Fuck Out" - you're our first contestant
we seriously had to hang a plastic bag on his ears so he could throw up right into it.
Can't show you right now as we are in public and he refuses to let me photograph his penis in a bar.
Forgot to mention there might be a picture of me being thrown in the air while at a Mexican restaurant
also, I just found three random bruises on my knee. probably from when I was velcrod to the stairs
Fine then. I'll just do all this coke on my own this weekend and die. It'll be strictly your fault.
i just wanna get shit faced and pass out in some random holly bush with a bucket on my head and stockings for shoes.
please tell me you're in jail and for some reason they have wifi
This is like the best thing that's ever happened to us. We're getting paid to sit around get high and eat. There is a Jesus
My suggestion is that you just get high and set shit on fire
Yes I did. Thanks. I was actually an hour and half early. I'm better at public transport than I thought. Guy behind me on the bus is also crying. We compared cry-snot. It was nice in a weird sad way.
I was drunk, he was taking a bodyshot while avoiding my piercing. I told him I loved him. He waited until I woke up with my hangover to say he loved me too. It was hangover magic.
Decided to make myself tequila gummy bears but got impatient and just drank the bowl of tequila.
I could have sworn that I went home last night... but judging from the couch I just woke up on, apparently not.
Randomize
