can a guy be partially circumsized? cause i dont exactly know what i was lookng at...
can you explain how you are here for one night and now my kitchen table is in 11 pieces..
If you try to operate on me with a Bic pen and vodka, I'm never talking to you again
Exact words that were just spoken as she was on her 6th, yes 6th piece of bread: "I'm only eating the soft and chewy inside of the bread-I am taking the crust home to feed my turtles"
The chick got into the cab with us and said we have 3 chances to guess what she just stuck up her ass. Hello to you to!
at work, .. 47 yr old boss was in a fight. 2 BLACK EYES. I may get fired. I cant stop laughing
that's where you went wrong. never assume I'm adult enough to do something on my own.
You called me a pussy and continued to eat an entire jar of peanut butter with only your hand.
I'm eating hummus off of my stomach right now.
I don't give a shit if you judge. This isn't about you or anyone else. This is about me and my chicken tenders.
Being drunk isn't an excuse for eating all of the bacon asshole
i always handshake my one night stand, im classy like that.
If you come home to me in lingerie and you start vacuuming...I need to reevaluate my priorities
You sat down in the middle of the road and started crying. We told you "Get your ass up or we're leaving you here." You replied "They'll findddd meeeeee" and ran after us.
He said it was the classiest hand job he ever had because my nails were painted red. We need to go to nicer bars from now on.
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