I always wonder when I meet a guy from online if he needs a moment to mentally register and accept the size of my ass. maybe ill wear a dress.
If you win this game of words with friends, ill suck you off for 30 minutes. No lie.
I cant last that long. Do i get the rollover minutes?
woke up with withdrawal cold sweats this morning. spring break must really be over.
Well, I just watched him puke into his pitcher at the bar, I doubt he cares about anything other than the fact that he needs a new beer.
Do you think he stole that soccer trophy that he gave you for the "best sweater award" from his five year old son?
I could barely talk to the cabbie and I was text bombing everyone. They need to make an auto timer app to prevent people like me from belligerent late night harrassing. And I was seeing double... Prob would have tried to give your leg a bj and then fallen down the stairs.
But he's not just anonymous male genitalia anymore. I've met him, I've seen his face.
I just laughed at the word pudding. I have no idea whats going on right now.
Blood work from physical was all good, apparently heavy alcohol use agrees with me
I currently look like a drunken mermaid, god I love beach parties.
He kept kissing me on the cheek when I was pretending to sleep while he cried
How many times is too many times to use the word 'fuck' in my thesis?
HE MIGHT HAVE YOUR BUTTHOLE, BUT HE CANT HAVE YOUR HEART. THATS MINE.
No, it's like a legit blood drive. It's not just her out in some parking lot with needles and ziplock bags
My bookbag can hold 30+ beers. They shoulda put that on the tag bc its a big selling point
Randomize
