Nicole wore just a belt and her pedometer and hopped on top of me last night. She "walked" 822 steps before we finished.
New charity walk idea!
I got laid because I told her I play guitar. I haven't played in 7 years and only know a G chord. I love this place.
Awkward moment #23: reasuring mom that the bf and I aren't having sex as seamen is running down my leg...
Sometimes I love sober logical me. She makes rare appearances but when she does she shines.
Just had sex in the darkroom, while a class was going on ten feet away. I finally have a good sex story.
Note to self: don't practice nerdy white girl dance choreography in the company bathrooms no matter how nice the huge mirrors and lighting are.
You're a waste of cheezeits
I was looking at our sex bingo and pretty much every single row or column has at least one kind of person that is harder to find than all the rest
We've made things harder for ourselves
The struggle will be part of the fun
Is it weird that i want a guy to ask me to homecoming by spelling it out in meatballs?
THATS VERY WEIRD
Just woke up. Will be over soon. DON'T LEAVE THE CHAMPAGNE UNSUPERVISED.
I was having a serious heart-to-heart, and then the weed gummy kicked in.
I think I came out of my blackout as I was ordering wine from the private wedding reception.
how is it I left wearing underwear then ended up with none? and why is it they are on you?
People probably think I’m a fangirl bc I go to so many shows but it’s really bc I like fucking the tour manager
I'd send you a picture as proof but I want to marry him some day and that would be a deal breaker.
Randomize
