Where the fuck is Rob at, he hasnt answered his phone in like 2 weeks.
Dude Rob died 2 weeks ago wtf?
Holy shit r u serious? How?
Just kidding, but im pretty sure he boned your gf and doesnt want to talk to you.
I'm at the laundry mat. This guy is here showing me his ankle monitor. The weird ones always find me.
He passed out drunk on top of me. Fully erect. Still inside me. Woke up like 1 minute later, and continued.
I just peed next to my dog in the yard. Unparalleled forms of bonding going on over here.
She came in to my room half naked at 3am asking me if I had seen the movie balls deep 7
There's a difference between southern and inbred. She just doesn't know that yet.
Am I the only one creeped out by the guy asleep behind our couch?
he spent like 10 minutes trying to convince us that he was throwing up in the bushes on purpose in order to cut weight for wrestling
He taught me where the gears in a five speed are with his penis.
Careful, it's a slippery slope to discovering you're bisexual...trust me.
Moments after comforting her about her boyfriend issues I found myself in the other room showing him my tits.
Seriously your house is like the underground railroad for unwanted gay kids
its gotten to the point where if her hand isn't on my butt i think we're in a fight
some kid just came up 2 me bleeding yelling "thats how u riot"
Sorry, i'm on a strict diet of vodka and regret
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