I prefer the term 'tenderly watching'
such a stalker...
she wanted to love me. she just didn't know it yet.
So how was last night?
Let's just say I danced with the devil
Huh?
I'm going to Hell for sure
is it bad that i kinda- ok, reallyyy don't remember having sex with him last night?
My morning has consisted of lying in a fetal position, eating a whole tub of ben and jerry's, talking to my cat, and setting all of our pictures on fire. Does that answer your question?
no seriously he was fingering me like he was really really frantically looking for a song on his iPod.
So I woke up today with someone's door knob in my pocket. I hope everbody else got out of the house ok.
There is a contact in my phone named "Bar Mcntysu." this is why we need a third person to go out with us.
Ya he's the booze devil, like if the black hole and Bermuda triangle joined forces with Captain Morgan
No more morning sex. Just for once, my vagina would like to go to work bone-dry and bone-free.
He balanced a treat on his nose, and then he rolled me a joint. My bf is the best pet ever.
Considering all of my stomach contents ended up in my center console, I'm a bit peckish.
I'm still alive btw, in case you were worried about my well being.
I find celibacy oppressive. Huge waste of my time and talents.
I'm not going out, it's sweat pants and gallon vodka night at my place and I'm the only one on the guest list.
This is because you lost at fooseball isn't it?
My ovaries melted while we were talking. I almost told him I would suck his soul out through his dick
That would be a memorable parent teacher conference for sure
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