you think thats bad? Today I had to pop a zit on my sack.
Crosby and Malkin: Two girls, one cup.
I told a kindergarten student that candy canes are bones of reject elves.
so while we were having sex, he stuck it in my but, and when he finished he goes next time can we have anal. i don't know if that means im tight or my butt hole is loose, i choose to think the first one
I have come to the conclusion that if you don't fulfill your life ambitions you should go into porn
I am highly attracted to the men and that's all i can say. I do not clap and make noises but i do turn to the side and say how i'd do incredible things to them if given the chance
You sent her a pic of your dick with 'guess what you cant have anymore' written on it with a marker.
Haha o man how much you've grown. From beer bonging wine and wearing cargo shorts to well, beer bonging beer and wearing cargo shorts
I.V.'s should just be available for purchase at Walmart. God I'm dehydrated.
He has what he calls a "Ben Franklin". It's a pubic hairdo based on the man himself; long on the sides and bald in the middle.
Dude I bought a 300 dollar buffalo painting. I'm no longer allowed to take shrooms.
I swear to god if I have to repeat this to you one more mother fucking time I will flip fucking shit and acidic rain will pour down upon your mother fucking soul
I just blacked back in and I'm at a kids birthday party in a suit and people are calling me uncle Carl. Never having your homemade liquor again.
Please don't finger me like a jackhammer. I'm a woman not a construction site.
I was pretty pissed in the morning when I realized he had fucked the fake tattoo right off my chest.
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