I'm drunk
Is that why you're texting me
Yes
Really stoned
just sent my roommate on a cheese run
if someoen knew that someone accidentally drunkly kissed your boyfriend would you want them to tell you/?
followup question: what if both somones were me?
Thanksgiving. A stoners favorite holiday
just hang any plant up and call it mistletoe.
at first I thought it was funny, but looking at it now, it screams "dramatic" and "medicated wipes."
All I remember about walking back home was that I maced my shadow.
I probably should have cut it off when he started putting queso on my nipples, but within ten minutes I was a self-serve burrito bar.
the moment we started interpretive dancing last night wouldve been a good time to stop drinking.
The nurse who handed me my discharge papers underlined and highlighted do not consume alcohol while on my painkiller its like she knows me.
No talking tonight. Just drinking and puking up memories
he came in the room wearing gloves & rapping while eating a corndog
knight in shining armor
I'm still confused. So he's NOT your cousin by blood, but WAS your cousin, on two separate occasions, by marriage? Still too weird I think...
He bent me in ways I couldn't imagine.. and im a gymnast.
You set a couch on fire in my brothers backyard?
Just the cushions
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