I saved $70 from being to drunk to go out last night so I figured I could buy a new watch.
Our phone convo was getting intense. Then I heard her say "quiet mommy is trying to have phone sex"
In the hospital waiting to be tested for the first uti of the school year....I'm BACK BTICHES.
i googled waterboarding like you asked. as long as you do it outside. we have carpet. but i wont be a part of it.
you fully convinced the taxi driver that we were in a race
In the middle of having sex, she said "if we continue, we're dating." I then pulled out and sat in the corner, naked. I deserve a Medal of Honor.
Having never done that before, When should one expect the horrible shame to end? Days, months, ever?
A week or so, depending on size. In your case, maybe give it a month.
I am pretty sure they consider me one of the "bros". They compliment girl's racks to me and are the human forms of dick-be-gone. They won't sleep with me more than once cause it's "weird", or let any "untrustworthy boys" sleep with me and I still help them get laid. Not...fair...
I want everyone to love me, and THEN I will choose who gets to eat me out all the time.
I guess I was blacked out I hopped a fence and hugged a cow that night.
You just want to live out all your fuck fantasies with all these girls through me. I know your game. Well played sir.
Like these jerks could have told me it wasn't a video call, I wouldn't have put on pants.
I will read books by day and do guys by night. A mental and physical enlightenment, if you will.
Oh dear. Sending much love.
Just send a machete.
i need to get crying drunk at the bar more often. i end up going home with guys who have big penises. its like God is saying "there, there, this will cheer you up".
Randomize
