Last night was so much fun. i kept trying to lick everyone
I wish i could sleep and get drunk at the same time...those are my 2 biggest needs right now
of all places to pass out....why right in front of our RA's door? OF ALL PLACES.
Two portable blenders. We are going to be popular and dangerous.
Its funny how you denied every part of the text except " you hate fat ppl"
I'm going to pre plan my black out tonight. I think I'll set a change of clothes out on my bed and unplug the oven.
sorry he hasn't talked to me since the surprise salvia incident...
Woke up the next morning in an 8 year old's bedroom. Saw my bra swinging from the spiderman ceiling fan and decided it would be best to dip out w/o it.
Also, I cannot stop picturing myself in a bar, 3 years from now ordering soda. Just soda. 30 pounds over weight and wearing a cat sweater. I feel like I'm heading in the wrong direction in life.
I'm not saying I would have to be high to sleep with him. I'm just saying it would probably help.
Figured out how to triple bathroom speed at #lollapalooza.. Girl squats, guy 1 goes between her, guy 2 uses urinal. Your welcome.
He had to put his grandma's photo away before I tied him to the bed. She doesn't need to see any of that.
I just had to explain why I ate a whole quart of mac and cheese before 8am. Not a good start to the day
She was giving me head, and a cop pulled up next to us. I freaked when he looked over at me, but so did he and rear ended the car in front of him.
Can u pick up some lemons on the way? I have Tequila and a sore throat..I need them for both
Randomize
