girl has like over 50 stars tattooed on her front, side and back. feels like i just fucked the universe.
Just ran into that chick u called from my phone and left her a MSG bout how she has aids
Ahaha, good shit
i no longer feel bad for not doin my schoolwork. im watching a porn in french. this MUST qualify as studying.
oh yea it is. i was not expecting to look at a snowbank and just see flying mushrooms
What did I eat last night that was bloody?
Puke, feathers, beads, and solo cups all on my way to class. I'm surprised anyone's alive after this weekend.
Can I just have sex with him and then never talk to him? I need him to be the Mr. Miyagi of my sex life.
The compounded multi day delayed hangover hit me hard today, with a vengeance normally reserved for large objects that go in my ass. I don't feel good.
He says we're "annoying" but that's an odd word to describe a couple of heroic liquor saiyans
They won't let me buy alcohol in the airport until 9am. Super judgemental
I pulled you and a keg around in a wagon for like five hours and apparently everyone else remembers it but us.
Our sub is singing "i believe i can fly" after yelling at the class this whole time and this is really hella weird
You said, "I'll have this whole island inside of you by 6 AM. Just point out who you want and I'll make it happen."
I figure I since I made out with him that I at least had to save his number in my phone.
All I remember is me taking my automatic nerf gun getting on top of him and saying..."look whos in control now!"
Randomize
