either fucking kiss her or kick her ass to the curb. Either way I can hear everything you are saying
nothing like morning wood sex at 4pm. funemployment ftw
i almost set my kitchen on fire last night. homecoming week is getting the best of me
i decided what we are doing for your 21st b-day: camelbacks filled with margaritas
I got laughed at by a homeless guy in a Daniel Boone hat. I have no clue what this means for my day
Dude, you need to man up. You passed out before a PRESEASON game. It's a long season.
His new place is a molesden. Like a hole in the ground. It's frightening how oddly private it is.
It rubs the lotion on it's foreskin...
Thanks for setting a pic of your balls as my desktop background. You'll find you're cc'ed on the mass email of it.
Sending dick pics while driving a car going 80 in the rain at night to a married woman? Why hello 2014
Dude. She was wearing nothing but Wonder Woman panties and a flag for a cape and sneaking around leaving PBR's by passed out people for the morning. She called herself the 'Merica Fairy.
Why haven't you proposed already?
The only good thing about the sex was that he finally cracked the spot on my back that's been hurting.
I shouldn't have watched rise of the planet of the apes and then gotten high. I'm now convinced that the cats are out to get me.
I am mentally ready for anal.
I’ve got a lot of questions but the first one has to be where you got the flame thrower.
The guy i took home was a circus freak. He jerked off 3 times in front me after we had sex. And he came every time.
Randomize
