It doesn't matter if they shave you or not, you're still susceptible to the staph infection.
is that paris hilton dressed up as the guy from star trek who hosts reading rainbow
What'd you guys eat?
Literally everything that was frozen.
the table of underagers at this wedding were seated 10ft from the open bar. currently 30 open containers on the table for 5 people. dinner hasn't even been served yet.
he got a charlie horse midthrust which triggered my orgasm we're still sorting this out.
Jen gave my number to some guy she met in NY. He sent me a picture of his weiner. He had nice shoes. I replied with a pic of bacon.
When in doubt always reply with bacon.
where are you?
talk to ya later, gotta sled down these stairs real quick
Dude if it is ever said "everybody get inside the police helicopter just showed up.". That means it was a successful party.
the police told me I had to sign a waiver stating that my car will no longer be used for crime activity.
No, just kidding. But your faith in me to throw a lesbian bridal shower makes me think I an pull it off. To the LGBT bar!
Are there any rules against fucking the hot TA?
Maybe for her....
Her problem, not mine
It's a sad statement on my day when the high point was getting a pap test.
I guess I just don't understand how the two main issues with your ex involve a cock ring and a Christmas tree
I wanted to write an apology letter to my vagina after that.
Should I be worried if two ants just crawled out of my purse?
Yes!
Randomize
