You say "I'm in class" like it matters... I'm getting a little tired of having to smoke by myself at 4:20 because you're in class.
Motor boating, judging by the amount of lipstick I found I would say between 6 to 8 times
She keeps referring to it as an "us" Either she is seriously mistaken on what fuck buddies are or she learned another meaning of the word "us"
Is tonight a drink a little and reminisce kinda night, or a drink everything and pray kinda night?
Just did coke off of a cross necklace and am headed to the strip club. Happy Easter!
It's amazing how not interested in talking to him I am since I've decided that he probably has chlamydia.
i seriously haven't spoken to him since i drunk dialed him and told him i loved his beard
He looked at me and just said "moist". The entire party shut down from uncomfortableness. He is an anti-party wizard.
You just sat there for two solid hours staring at your monitor and every five minutes screamed "LEGOOOOOS"
I think it was a smart move. Quickest way to get over a guy, hook up with his friends.
Look I'm really high right now, and if I were to leave this house, it would be for the sole purpose of getting an ice cream sandwich. So can you please just do it.
Shut up. You had me at killer robots. Your place or mine?
I'm drunk and he's still weird.
you were screaming "I don't need a shirt!" repeatedly while in the process of taking it off and flashing the bouncer. we got kicked out. thanks a lot.
Question: the touchscreen on my phone randomly quit working, do you think this could be a latent reaction from me peeing on my phone last weekend?
Randomize
