If i could bang her from 80ft away, I would
Great, now everyone thinks I've had giraffe semen in me
like semen in my mouth is absolutely disgusting but i'd still like to experience it
I swear that when I have my own bathroom, I'm gonna lock myself in there and masterbate for at least 3 days in sheer appreciation of it.
I knew she was going to get knocked up just by looking at her facebook pics
he just came in and straightened the chair and left again
As an added bonus, you will have a "25 blowjobs a month" voucher, expiring thirty days after the first initial bj.
I mean you guys are my friends and all but if you fuck with me I will not hesitate to set you on fire
I feel like weed makes my smarter. I'm watching the stocks and the way I understand if, do not invest in Yahoo right now because they are not fit for that.
I just woke up in my locked bathroom. It's 5 PM. What happened?
Y'know i appreciate how accepting you are of me being a terrible person.
My roommates don't agree with the whole tv in the bathroom idea. Fucking barbarians.
I found a hot kiwi last time and sucked his dick. That's what rooftop bars are made for.
I'm trying to find a place to hide weed in my mother in law's house...
Married life problems?
He just walked in on me naked with a beer in my hand eating a calzone in bed. If he wasn't in love with me before...
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