How do you wash franks red hot sauce, whip cream, grapejuice and shame out of silk?
I would just throw it away. You cant just wash out shame, it has to soak for like a month.
I could really do without pictures of your asses in my inbox. That said, I'm extremely jealous that I wasn't involved.
Tomorrow, if I don't look at least 5% better than I do on a regular day to day basis, I want you to hit me and tell me that no one will ever love me if I continue to look like I just rolled out of a cocaine induced hibernation. I'm asking you for tough love.
Yo I found your batman costume.... It was in my pool with a shitload of beer cans
I would like to apologize once again for rubbing your thigh with my hands and face for a very long time last night.
Would I chase a raccoon with a flaming stick sober?
of course we called 911. an innocent mans booze was at steak
You were throwing cups at people in the basement, yelling at them to get out of your swamp.
I'm glad I can share my workout progress with you via my nudes
I had sex in the back of a hot foreign guy with a lacoste eye patch's car
Let's put it this way. Mom is bringing me a new shirt and I smell like lube.
I'm the kind of gay who carries his anxiety medication in case the club scene gets too fierce
For future reference, when he drunkenly screams "YOUR MOTHER SUCKS COCKS IN HELL," he means that he's about to throw up. Invest in a bucket.
I'm still here... I feel so bad wearing your mom's cardigan at a strip club 🙈
I got so drunk last night that I was drunk in my dream. Good night
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