I just worked out and used handles of vodka as weights. Whoever said alcoholism is detrimental to you health obviously has no fucking idea.
doing lines of blow through a tampon applicator in the study lounge at 7am so i can finish an italian composition that was due a week and a half ago...such a good student.
I tapped out to boredom. She bought me a full meal at Subway. Two tap beers and a pretty weak long island iced tea. I'm five dollars cheaper to fuck than she is.
I knew he was a nice guy, because when we switched positions he flipped the mattress so I wouldn't have to lay in a pool of his sweat.
Found a pint glass in my snow pants.
I dunno. The only plans I have for sure after finals are smoking a bowl and eating a 5 pound gummy bear. btw I bought a 5 pound gummy bear
omg. MEgabus. stoned.
Theres these two guys talking.
I'm eating the rest of the Xmas shrooms and welcoming 2012 by communing with the pine cone.
I can't wait till we are old and wrinkly and I can turn to you and ask, "Remember when you Rick Jamesed the shit out of that couch??"
hey dude, just got with the girl in H4. so mark H off the apartment list
haha we are half through our lease and already checked off 17 letters
He crawled outside into the bushes to throw up. He's just laying there now but he says he'll be ready to come home if we just give him five
About to go get a free burrito for kissing a bald man in public
I think Facebook knows you fucked me. All of a sudden I get everything you do in my news feed.
Remind me to do laundry tomorrow so i have something decent to take off when i get laid.
Is she still on a quest to lick every stranger that enters the bar, or have the restraining orders reached critical mass?
Randomize