we might have left him a semi topless video on his wall. godd i just hope they suspend my accont so i stop doing thses things.....
Why do girls get to wear clothes that say "do me now" but guys don't have that kind of option?
I mean, what would the male equivalent of a slutty dress be?
I googled "I hate my uterus" just to make sure I wasn't the only one.
No, I'm not okay. Girls are wearing BUMPITS here.
I just realized there's an entire generation of children that will never know Alex Trebek had a mustache... Sad.
You are colorful like whore, yet adorable, like sad puppy. You need more drink.
Keep in mind that he's 43, unemployed and living with his parents. There's really not much we could do to make his life worse.
Hovering on the line between her being fuckable and me being too drunk to fuck. Life's juggling act in progress here.
he just flipped me off the bed, said "deal with it", and came on me.
I chugged a beer while I was riding him and he told me it was the sexiest thing he has ever seen. this guy knows class when he sees it.
They figured our he was high when he told the manager he wanted a break to go wrap his dick in toliet paper and pretend it was a ghost.
We were sitting in a hot tub debating how drunk we could get by osmosis if we kept spilling our drinks in it. This is what engineering college does to you.
I can't believe this. 100 bucks says my Botox lasts longer than their marriage will.
I could teach a class on "expressing your thanks through photos taken of yourself in the shower"
Are you serious?! She sent a pizza instead of showing up?!
She did indeed. Papa Johns. It helped because I was super hangry. That bitch is smart!
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