this is like her 8th guy since december, is she wasn't frumpy people would call her a whore
you told the bartender not to open the bottle because you were gonna put it in your purse in case you get cut off later
He was wearing his Class of 2007 shirt so I sat there for 5 minutes and read all the names of the guys I can remember giving head to.
Were making a bet for which twin will relapse while in rehab. I'm going for the chubbier one
It was literally me in an evening gown and him in a tux with six bottles of Vodka at Jons.
And this was for your brother's Christening?
I will come over now to take full advantage of you in your vulnerable state.
Fine. I should warn you I just threw up in danas fish tank. Fish are dead. Livers dead. I smell and look like a dead animal. And not showering. So deal with it.
Wearing the flip cup varsity team sweatshirt was the best descision of my life.
probably one of the worst weekends ever... i got peed on by his sleepwalking roommate.
Fuck away man. Like 3% of these new people will be back next week. This is the best week of the year to slam bitches at the gym.
How does one go about breaking up with their bf on vacation?
Sleeping with him wouldn't be considered hoeing out... It seems more like babysitting.
He's coming over again? GIRL, you're thoroughly enjoying the month of Dicktember.
...this is why fuck buddies should be only for grownups.
if i had an alexa it would be saying “have sex with guys that don’t care about you”
Dude I just woke up with a dog sleeping on me.
I thought you didnt have a dog??
Exactly.
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