Any particular reason you put 2 smashed up limes in my back pocket last night?
his dad told me thanks for making his little boy a man at breakfast this morning
Reason #1 for no sex outdoors: Mosquito bites. Awkward, awkward mosquito bites.
I never want to hear the words 'my therapist says . . . ' while naked again.
Gees I domt know what your deal was. You kept looking at Nick and shaking your head frantically and doing a weird motion with your hands
Tgat was the small dick alert
No, i will not have sex with him again. It felt like he was trying to bulldoze his way through me. My vagina is on strike.
because i know somewhere at some party, behind someones closed bed room door youre being feed a key full of mollie.
TONGUES ARE JUST MEAT TENTACLES IN OUR MOUTHS OMG
HOW ABOUT I DON'T WAKE UP TO THESE TYPES OF TEXTS
The drunk fake out is her specialty. She'll agree to come with us and two seconds later we check to make sure she's still there and we see her booking it down the hall in the opposite direction.
He asked me for a pic so I sent him a pic of my boyfriends dick.
Hypothetically speaking, when I get a sugar glider would it be frowned upon to bring it Ito classes with me in m pocket?
Am I the only one who saw the used condom in the driveway this morning
im single, its not even nine am on Valentine's day and I've already gotten laid. suck it relationships
I don't know how guys can take themselves seriously when they see themselves naked
Drunk me bought a cell phone last week and began texting sober me. The conversation between the two is still on going.
Randomize