ok plan lets look hot and dance like whores.
i just made a list of the people i have slept with. is it bad that some of them are just either names of the places i met them or the color of the shirts?
i also rounded the number up for good measure. i am sure there are a few i have forgotten about.
you know that annoying kid in my psych class? accidentally hit him in the face with a door today. perfect end to the semester.
he told me that if i wanted to smoke he could make a piece out of my shoe. were keeking this kid around
its not college until your roomate walks in on you having sex in his bed. twice
I mean what are real friends for if they won't hold down your wedding dress to allow for a keg stand
note to self, drunkenly bedazzeling the silverware was a stupid fucking idea
her best friend is in town and she told me that they used to fool around when they were drunk and I'd have to "help keep that from happening"
you motherfucker
Not sure if he was actually hot or hot in a "he brought a live chicken to the party" kinda way but I got his # regardless
I've been there a week.. I'd rather all my coworkers not know that I'm already sleeping with my boss.
I slapped him but he didn't wake up. He just nuzzled my head, hugged me closer, and smiled.
I'm going to need to invest in some knee pads if I keep having nights like tonight
You set fire to his cat.
In my defense, I did not think it would be in the trash bag.
Apparently I have a "problem" because I enjoy doing bong rips in the shower
I'm fine. Heading home now...crying. Michael Bolton totally understands me!
Randomize
