The 3 of us think it's time to start drinking.
3?
Me, myself and I
we saw you sitting at the door of the dorm trashed, wrapped in DANGER tape with a stolen balloon around your wrist
I have on cowboy boots and a ten gallon hat. I'd say I'm a little past tipsy
I am going to get arrested. I am yelling fuck repeatedly, wearing a Bird jersey and polka dot pants while pounding wine. Amazing mug shot to follow.
Does Vicodin go better with white or red wine?
he ran me a hot bath. i thought i was in a pot and was going to be eaten. i was strangely ok with this
Do you think I can wear the dress I went to jail in with the shoes I went to prom in to the wedding tonight?
siamese drinking twins saturday is a go ... bring duct tape.
We were walking up the stairs and I asked Dominick what floor the party was on. The cop who had just tried breaking it up was walking down the stairs, drinking a slurpee, and answered, "Third floor."
Because its Monday... And I'm determined to just be drunk for the rest of the semester
This chick had a condom box organized by size with dividers that glowed in the dark.
I mean I just feel if I'm not being fat and lazy then I'm not really being myself
Next time you have him paint you an outfit so you can do you walk the street naked TAKE A SHOWER BEFORE YOU GET IN THE BED. MY sheets look like like an acid trip
I am officially in a love triangle with my celebrity crush
that moment you remember partying with someone several years ago.. and don't remember if you slept with them or not.
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