the chick doesn't look like she's put anything in her mouth for weeks other than his dick.
you mean i was at the winter classic?
I've been practicing for you. Including stockpiling medical supplies for curing hangovers.
You tried to luge a beer down a flip flop.
I'm not entirely sure what we did is legal in the U.S., but I know that couple wont be the same
I will pre answer that I did not see it the fun way. He was peeing outside.
Doing lines of coke through pieces of licorice. Because I can
For context, I was hiding under the pong table mooing at everyone by that point.
This guy smelled his armpits before trying to approach me at the bar
The bad news is that I stole all your drugs. The good news is that ITS KICKING IN!
It's not even 11, i dropped a shot glass, nick is bleeding, and everyone is drunk
I can now recognize that when my wine bottle reaches a certain point, I probably shouldn't tweet, text or call anyone. RESPONSIBILITY
Blacked in cold and wet, with them areound me singing Aaaaall we are saaaaayiiiing is YOU PEED YOUR PANTS
Remember that gum I swallowed 3 days ago? I just threw it up.... whole.
So there we are, fucking beneath the Christmas tree and I glance up and see one of the local Jehovah's witnesses staring in horror through the decorative glass in the front door. I'm so proud of us.
Randomize
