Courtney? Is that you? I have pictures of this very same night.
I just saw my grandmother naked. again. this needs to stop now.
my bed looks and feels like i need to buy plan b.
He was taking the caps off the vodka bottles and throwing them out the window so we'd have to finish them. Engineers have the best logic.
What happened to chicks over dicks?
That rule does not apply to 9 inch dicks..
Question: rebounding with your exboyfriend over your rebound guy is healthy right?
He's like Medusa, you can't look directly into his eyes or you'll turn into a slut.
dude, i warned you that using a card to pay for my hotel room was a bad idea. You deserve the extra $600 in cleaning fees
She had cheddar bay biscuits in her purse. Biscuits, Id and cash. I'm gonna marry her.
Hey, I'm off work. Wanna take a metric fuckton of adderall, possibly get daydrunk, and get my hair cut?
It's fun yes. But hard on the body. I woke up with her purse, socks and one of her shoes in my room. The other shoe was outside. What the fuck were we doing last night?
I feel like it is our duty to make homophobic people more afraid of us. They're never going to change, but maybe we can get to a "wrath of god" kind of worship-him-or-he'll-destroy-you-with-his-care-bear-stare type thing.
He's driving 2 hours to visit me and he's bringing weed. I love him so much.
he answered his phone during sex and left to go help that drama queen with her latest bullshit. I'm drinking all his vodka. it's asshole tax
HIDE THE INFLATABLE PENIS
Randomize
