:)
Wipe that smile off your face.
Every one of her profile pictures looks like an ad for American Apparel. Of course she has syphilis.
and my loofah got caught on my nipple ring in the shower today. what an awful experience.
She cut off the top of a watermelon and is now eating it with a spoon. She's more than half done.
I'm sorry to inform you but your friends with benefits card has expired has the beginning of the year. If you wish to renew your card you must submit a picture of a fully erect penis. Please note that not all request for a FWB card is accepted.
dude he was laying on two half-naked chicks, as they rubbed him down with lotion, while rolling a joint. hes like a modern-day african king
I'm pretty sure I swallowed a whole condom
Hahah what did you even say to him?!
That I was gonna inflate his vagina with a leaf blower?
Oh.
Seriously your house is like the underground railroad for unwanted gay kids
Jasmine is diving into bushes again.
Masturbating during the Olympics and cumming during the national anthem really is everything it's cracked up to be. Just thought you should know.
No seriously, I don't care if you just sucked God's dick. I have had a better Fat Tuesday than you
You had sex with him AND his man bun. Like not just him but also the bun.
The first thing my Christmas gift money is buying is a dildo.
I Never thought my late 30s would end up with me getting eaten out on a desk in the managers office of a lululemon, but I guess being a franchise owner has its perks!
Randomize