I painted my nails silver
And what are the implications of that?
Is there supposed to be a msg in that? Just thought ud like to know it looks like I fingerbanged an alien
If I could pick any std, I would pick genital herpes. Seriously. Have you seen the commercials? The lady is riding a fucking bike, swimming, and on a date. I have a perfectly fine vag and all I do is go to the library.
Well the light went out so I was throwing up by candle light. Strange moment in my life.
i actually have a tan line from him holding my boob while we were sunbathing
The girl who overdosed in the bathroom at work is back....help?
Turned out not to be so bad. He had a big dick and i owed him for all the free beer over the year.
I was woken up at 4am by a stranger shaking my foot who said I looked like I needed a cigarette.
I'll have my hookups make my March Madness picks. Win my bracket, win my heart. That's how it works right?
My cat clawed my face because i tried to give it a foot massage...never doing shrooms again.
So, this year for my birthday, want to get rip-roaring schmammered and watch my episode of my super sweet 16? We can do lines off my tiara.
I think this agreement was sent by God. I get to do my own thing, get laid, and he still makes me breakfast in the morning.
Donald Trump and I would be so adorably orange together!
The psychic I saw today told me NOT to text the guy I haven't heard from yet since our first date this weekend b/c it wouldn't go anywhere...Miller light said otherwise. Miller light > Cleo
I'm back in the dating scene now... Since the legality issue calmed down. And my stalking charges were dropped.
But once you are just right and I work my tongue in the right spots and hot wax your balls and inner thighs. I will have you right where I want you.
Who is this?
Oops wrong number
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