Maybe i should go to church more so i can meet girls like in that song, you know, the ones that act slutty on every day but sunday...
ah, so the catholic church. i gotcha
The kid in front of me is videochatting and typing to his gf. I should make poop/sex faces over his shoulder, right?
I just almost got out my car and drop kicked this one chick over parking. Welcome to the first day of spring semester.
Just sold a bike on craig's list for 4 four lokos and a 40. How bad do you miss college?
thanks. im glad you find me better in your comparison between me and fat girl porn.
Pretty sure I blacked out the last 48 hours, the last thing I remember is the 4 pm bar crawl on Thurs
Can you believe they're going to let me be a doctor?
I just saw a girl on crutches doing a walk of shame. She is either super dedicated, or her night didn't go as planned.
All i know if I'm throwing uo into a bag with a smiley facE on it right now and this is not a smileuy face time right nowe
That girl is nothing but trouble. She's 40% red hair and 60% daddy issues.
But mostly fuck him senseless. Render him speechless. Have him look at my vagina and wonder, "WHAT SORCERY IS THIS?!"
I have never fucking hated the horrible sound of dozens of off-key recorders BLARING their fucked rendition of "Fais Do-Do" in unison against the screams of an adult male... more than I do now. This is why people avoid teaching. Kill me. End it all.
Tell the cops to let you through! Tell them you need to do drugs!
That's it. I'm moving to LA & sitting on his face.
I know. I'm a saint. Saint of sitting on faces.
My boss just offered me a vodka mixed drink at work I do not have a real job
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