I jusy said out loud "gingers unite in the middle of the night"
Last night I saw a drag queen take a shot of Red Hot that was soaked into a tampon. I fucking love my life!
I too understand the importance of cheesy bread
shes still here... layin in my bed watching a beyonce concert on tv drinking leftover franzia straight outta the bag and crying
Paris has not been good for her. Everytime she has a one night stand from a different country, she buys a mini flag and tapes it to her wall with the others
IF WE WERE REALLY BEST FRIENDS FOREVER YOU GUYS WOULD AGREE TO A WATCHING A PORNO PARTY
Looks like I've become the Walter White of my PhD cohort.
So, I'm about to take my pants off in the Walmart parking lot, when am old lady parks next to me. I'm all the way in the back next to the semis. What the hell?
Meet at Walmart straight from work to buy items for hurricane fun. Then blast some wine, make some sex, blast a bowl and cuddle each other till the sun comes up?
That's the most romantic New Orleans hurrication I've ever heard of. Can I have your babies?
Napping in front of family members can be embarrassing when you get a christmas boner in your sleep
Your grandma changed her Netflix password :(
Well. Another one of my exes came out of the closet.
I am mildly hung over. Decided pants are very unnecessary right now.
high I am. I am yoda. Yoda I am
Man it shouldn't be possible to get mad while you're stoned. I feel like ive broken one of the laws of physics
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