Sorry I totally forgot to text you back. When you texted me I was at work at the pharmacy and it was stupid busy. And then of course I had my 8 hour "shoot me b/c half of Loyola comes in to buy plan B" shift.
you busted in the room, ripped the covers off of us, ... and fist pumped
I'm home and safer than post-menopausal sex; you're welcome for the image. And yes, I did just use a semi-colon hammered.
How's work?
Spinning.
Just got my first unemployment direct deposit!!!' celebrating at the beach
Me toooooo!! Margaritas
I never knew being a drain on a functioning society would feel so good
I dunno. The only plans I have for sure after finals are smoking a bowl and eating a 5 pound gummy bear. btw I bought a 5 pound gummy bear
I was trying to be a bartender for my boyfriend and his friends last night, but I was too drunk so I just kept bringing them ice cubes in my hand.
Dude, she sent me a nude of her posing in the mirror and her dad was in the reflection
Getting stoned and sitting front row in a legal class.. Not my best idea
If you think for one second that I would forget Mardi Gras, you clearly don't know how much I love boobs.
Packing a mid day bowl in the Sonic parking lot. Have I gone too stoner?
Pretty sure i brought my phone charger to a booty call
so i EARNED it!?! i EARNED dying alone with cats!!?
do me a favor, I need this weekend off so can you work your magic and blow my boss again?
TJ is going to paint me in a Patriots Jersey he can paint you in an eagle jersey. Did this last year and got so much dick.
Randomize
