pube in her braces AGAIN. barely kept a straight face.
Just watched my manager erase "we've been 2 days wo an accident" and change it to "0" these ppl are too high.
When she can manipulate the direction of her leg hair, you know its time to leave
he had his head down and said he was listening for the buffalo, he had to still be drunk.
Did you get the "i have a yeast infection from that wet frat bathroom floor" text?
Someone spilled vodka all over the elevator floor. Bring straws.
it's a simple rule - pass out shirtless on the couch, become an airsoft target.
Yes. Amanda is the only option and I want cake so I can sacrifice my vagina.
No shame December is a go.
He wanted to have sex in a church because he has keys to it from court-ordered community service. WHAT IS STANDARDS?
If there was a card that said "I'm sorry for throwing up on your bathroom counter" I would send it to you.
I found her outside drinking steak sauce out of the bottle.
Cocaine and dance dance revolution for 4 hours. I consider last night a success.
Nooo. I was entirely happy pretending that my vagina only existed for peeing and releasing Satan's waterfall.
Fun fact: nipples work on touch screens. Tell your friends :)
When we were finished she immediately got up, cut a star out of a piece of paper, colored it gold, taped it to my chest and deemed me the Sheriff of Sex.
Randomize